Thriving in ministry
Pastoral ministry is rewarding – but rewarding moments can also be very draining. When good things happen, the workload increases. In my case, that involved planting two churches that ultimately went on to purchase, finance and construct first unit buildings with volunteers.
This dynamic creates a paradox for us. As ministry is draining us, we are to be models of vibrancy and joy. We are to incarnate abundant living. How do we manage to do that when our roles are at times sucking the life out of us? Everyone’s journey is different but here are some things that helped me to thrive during my 34 years of serving in my native New England.
Keep your sense of calling close at hand.
We serve the Lord not just because we choose to, but because He called us. He is the One who qualifies us, equips us, and deploys us. Draining moments can lead to questioning our “competencies,” which can be paralyzing, so reminding yourself that your competency lies in His call can be a lifesaver.
Avoid the Jesus complex.
On the eve of my ordination, I received an encouragement letter from a mentor who couldn’t travel to be a part of the service. His main advice was don’t take yourself too seriously. That advice has been priceless to me. It’s tempting to think and act as though everything related to the church depends on us. It “grows” if we do well. It is healthy if we are healthy. It struggles if we struggle. It is so freeing to remember that the Church is Jesus’ Body, and that it has been around for centuries before me and will last long after me. Obviously, this should not serve as a cloak to accept mediocrity, but in the context of faithfulness, it is freeing. We serve, but He gives the increase.
Don’t neglect family or friendship.
A mentor of mine in seminary warned against having close friends in the church because people will think you have favorites, and if/when they let you down, it will hurt even more. I think that is the worst advice I ever got! Ministry is a relational experience. While we are pouring into others, we need people who are filling us. I have had good friends in every ministry I have been in, and they have been a godsend. I also realized that the circle of relationships that would never transition with a new ministry assignment was family. I have found making time for family to be invigorating. When I would get my two boys’ game schedules, they would go on my calendar right away. I must have seen over 1000 baseball games between T-Ball and college! Now I could have been doing “ministry stuff” during all those games, but it lifts my spirit today that my adult sons call me regularly to process what is going on in their lives and families. You can multiply that feeling when it comes to enjoying an empty nest with my wife, Christina.
Play hard.
Find a hobby or activity you love and don’t neglect it. Take a real day off and indulge. Go fishing. Embrace humility on the golf course. Build a piece of furniture. Cook a fantastic meal. Paint. Go for a bike ride. Do something. Enjoying God’s creation by engaging our interests has a marvelous way of revitalizing our spirit.
These tips have proven valuable to me, and I am certain there are others you could add to this list. Do so, and thrive! Being the light of the world clearly involves incarnating God’s incredible joy. Let’s excel at it!
Neal Davidson is the lead pastor at Hope Chapel in Sterling, MA.